Where's the Trust?

This week I was reminded of the importance of the most crucial part of the sacred contract between actor and director- the actor must trust the director. All of the biggest issues I have had in my theatre career have been caused by a breach in that trust.
     I was a brand new camp director in the performing arts camp I had created when a 3rd Grader ran away. Seriously. It was July, and this kid ran out of the theater- BAREFOOT- and ran four blocks on a burning July afternoon. We new immediately that he had run, but didn't realize he had run out the building. We were still searching the building for him when his mother brought him back (he had already called her and she picked him up at the local library- again, BAREFOOT). Why did he run? He didn't want to do what the director told him to do.
    The most miserable musical I ever did was last year. The cast could have been phenomenal because they were so talented. Instead, at least half the chorus was pissed the entire time because they didn't get the part they wanted. Now, I understand the disappointment with not getting the role you want (believe me, perpetual chorus member here). But when it comes down to it, the constant, bitching, complaining and asking why so-and-so got the lead is just a disguise for, "I don't trust you as a director. You don't know what you're doing." We had people drop out of that show due to the roles they were given, and so many complaining conversations, I don't even remember them all.
    Interesting thing happened though. A lot of those untrusting people left. Some just moved on, but we cut several out. And life got happier. A lot happier. I know that because our business  is theater, we will always be dealing with the trust issue. Each new person that comes through our doors will need to build trust with us, and sometimes that is a long process.
    But what prompts this post today is several people who have been working with us for over 2 years and still don't have the trust. At first I wondered, "Why don't they just leave? They obviously think we don't know what we're doing, and that they're much better than they actually are. Why make themselves and us miserable?" But this weekend, I have come to a different musing, "Why don't I just let them go as actors? This job is too hard without someone making ME miserable all the time!" I started making that decision earlier this week, and I have to tell you, I am feeling a whole lot happier.
     Takeaway advise (it's free, so take it for what it's worth)- whatever is the most important aspect of your sacred contract with others, whatever that non-negotiable item is, as soon as someone breaks it, realize that it is your decision whether or not to keep them in your life, but if you do, there is a good chance they will make you miserable!